Dear Friend,
"I'm struggling. I'm having a tough time. I'm drinking too much."
These are the words I had been feeling and thinking for months before I finally said them out loud to my wife Danielle, and eventually to my coach and Ottawa Senators teammates.
Having that first conversation, as hard as it was, gave me the direction I needed to get help last year for my alcohol dependence.
About a year before this, I was really struggling. At first, I was handling things but then — I wasn’t. I just couldn’t switch it off. I wasn’t being honest with my wife or with myself. Trying to battle through a hangover when you play professional hockey is just not possible. Your timing is off and you can’t give it 100 per cent.
After another late night last November, I got on the ice for practice and made it through two drills. I said to myself, “I’ve got to get off the ice at this exact moment and get myself some help.” I knew there was no way I could do this alone.
There are so many people, including NHL players and other professional athletes, that live with addiction and mental health issues…issues that aren’t always brought to light, because not everybody wants to be forthcoming about their personal struggles. This is especially true when you’re in the media and often a role model to young children.
But I chose to speak out about my alcohol addiction, so that I might be able to help others who are going through something similar.
I made the decision that it was time to no longer suffer in silence.
If you’re reading this, you probably care deeply about supporting mental health care for people in our community. Your gift today will not only help people who urgently need your support, but every dollar you give before December 15th will be generously matched by my good friends, Barbara Crook and Dan Greenberg.
At the end of every day, when I come home to my family, I’m not Bobby Ryan the professional hockey player…I'm a husband and I’m a dad. I have to take out the trash every Friday, just like everyone else, and I go through difficult times in my life, just like everyone else.
The only difference is that I’m able to use my platform to talk about things that matter – like mental health and the work being done at The Royal. I want people to hear my story of recovery and say, “Hey, if Bobby Ryan can talk about his addiction openly and get help, then so can I.”
Addiction knows no boundaries. And for many families in our community, the COVID-19 pandemic has worsened existing mental health issues and people are turning to substances as a way to cope.
Many of us are ultimately battling the same thing. And we need a place like The Royal to turn to, so that we never have to face that battle alone.
My wife Danielle and my two kids, Riley and Chase, mean the world to me. I don’t know where I would be today without them. While I was working on getting better, all I kept thinking was, “Help yourself, so that you can help them every single day.”
Bedtime is my favorite time of the day now because I lay down with Riley, my four-year-old daughter, and we play “I spy” every night. That kind of family time is something that only two years ago I would have struggled with, because of the place I was in with my addiction.
Now I look forward to quality time with my family and I’m so grateful every day that I have such caring people in my life who continue to stand by me.
Your donation today will help change the trajectory of the lives of so many people who are struggling with addiction and mental illness – just like I was last year.
Government funding only goes so far, and though the prevalence of mental illness and addiction continues to grow in our province, it receives just seven per cent of health care dollars. The Royal depends on the support of our generous community to help people like me get better and find hope again.
Sincerely,
Bobby Ryan
Proud husband and father
Former Right Wing #9, Ottawa Senators
