The holiday season, with its joyful festivities and family gatherings, can be a challenging time for many individuals, especially in the context of distressing news and current events.
Dr. Anik Gosselin, a psychologist at The Royal’s Brockville Mental Health Centre, who has been practicing since 2006, says her clients are more inclined than ever to discuss the distress caused by global events.
"Never had I seen clients in my office who want to talk about what's going on in the world until the pandemic," said Gosselin. "There's a sense of threat that's all around us. There's a loss of trust in what people see in the media. They don't know what to believe anymore."
Gosselin recommends the following practical coping strategies tailored to individuals navigating holiday stress amid challenging times.
1. Limit news consumption and turn to trusted information sources
Even though it might be easier said than done, finding a balanced approach to news consumption is the first step. (Think healthy bites of news as opposed to a buffet.) In an era of endless news and information, Gosselin recommends people "be smart with what they watch, and how much they watch."
Finding a way to stay informed while maintaining your mental health is crucial. For many, this starts with limiting exposure to distressing news. This can be done in a few different ways:
- Turn off notifications for news apps or remove them from your devices altogether.
- Use technology to your advantage. For example, you can use the "Do not disturb" mode on your devices to limit news and social media consumption to specific times. There are also apps and browser extensions that block specific news websites or even keywords.
- Focus on diverse and reliable news sources. For example, you could limit yourself to one TV news broadcast in the evenings, listen on the drive to work, or one news website. At the same time, cross-referencing information from various outlets is also a good idea. If multiple reputable sources are reporting the same facts, it’s likely more reliable.
- Designate spaces in your home for news-free relaxation. (For example, bedrooms and bathrooms!)
- Leave your phone out of the bedroom so it’s not the last thing you see at night or the first thing you see when you wake up.
Gosselin also recommends finding “good news” to offset negative news. This also serves as a reminder there are good people in the world.
2. Focus on what you can control
Gosselin emphasizes the importance of recognizing one's power amidst external uncertainties. “Focus on where you have power and what you have some control over,” she says.
Volunteering with a cause to counter the bad news that is affecting you can be helpful. Individuals who are worried about climate change, for example, could volunteer with local environmental organizations.
“There's a lot of research showing that helping others has an incredibly powerful effect,” says Gosselin. “Helping others will actually increase your happiness.”
3. Practice deep breathing
Gosselin is a fan of using meditation to calm our minds and bodies but recognises that it is not for everyone and can be challenging for some. She’s also a big advocate of the simple act of deep breathing. "You cannot be more in the present moment than when you breathe," she says.
Simply taking a few deep breaths can be calming in an emotional moment. Try “box breathing” if you’re ready to take it to the next level. Watch the video below for an easy tutorial:
4. Set realistic expectations and practice self-compassion
Given the societal pressure associated with the holiday season, Gosselin urges individuals to be mindful of unrealistic expectations.
Advertisements and movies around this time of year often show happy families gathered around a turkey. "Remember that things are not like that for many people," says Gosselin.
Gosselin also recommends being mindful of using the word “should” as you go about the holiday season. Examples might include:
- "I should attend every holiday party to be sociable."
- "I should host a perfect gathering for my family."
- "I should buy expensive gifts to show my love."
- "I should find the 'perfect' gift for everyone."
Being aware of your "shoulds" helps differentiate genuine desires from societal expectations and reduces self-judgment, reduces pressure on self, mitigates stress, encourages self-compassion, empowers personal growth, and ultimately fosters a better sense of well-being.
“We know, scientifically even, that “the shoulds" increase feelings of unhappiness, resentment, and frustration,” says Gosselin. “Things don't need or should be a certain way. It is the way it is. Try to enjoy what you do have, not what you should have, and don’t try to make everyone happy.”
As individuals navigate the holiday season amid a backdrop of global challenges and a barrage of negative news, Gosselin hopes people take a moment to think about what they need to do to maintain mental well-being and approach the festive season with more joy and less stress. She encourages people to make a plan, and more importantly, stick to it. It doesn’t need to be complicated either. Get some fresh air, go for a walk, and take time away from social media. Focus on your favourite aspects of the holidays and engage in activities that promote well-being, such as volunteering or helping others in different ways, or spending time with loved ones.
“Most of all, be compassionate, not just to others, but to yourself as well,” says Gosselin.
